I asked her if she had an emotional attachement and she said she was not attached to him but the business/shop. May God give you peace, strength, and even joy as you walk forward into the next stage of your life. He has continued to reject me physically, and still to this day defends her when her name comes up I know that I am not wrong, I know that even IF( big IF) he never slept with her, he had an intense emotional relationship with her, that superceeded ours by far, and that alone has ruined our relationship and our marriage, and I cannot let go of the it, I need to know the truth, and why! He told me this that day a week later when I found her name in his address book. I am so sorry to hear that this has happened to you. I gave him a second chance after living in his car and finding his self alone he hasnt done it since. He denies it. My husband and I have an active physical relationship but he spends more and more time on his computer and texting now. And i really cant get much lower. I had a 1:1 that he agreed for me to talk with her about this. He acted as if he took up for her. Thank you for being here, and for sharing your experience with your new boyfriend. Mine, for example, wants a 100% totally devoted wife who will support him 100% towards working for his goals, financially and physically, be there 100% of the time at his beck and call and look after house, yard, business (without the money to compensate for work done), have the body and shape of a 20 year old woman plus just listen, talk and laugh, cook and clean, and be always sexually available for his pleasure. Can the lost help the uncertain & the uncertain help the lost? Then about 4 years ago, I was telling a joke to my other neighbors and there he was laughingI introduced myself to him. He did all the bull.. your crazy that woman is a whore. He uses the extra chores as his excuse for always being tired. Its not only in the nature of man to have multiple partners. I personally dont he think he would change. Its a fascinating look into a marriage and the mind of a cheating man! be abusive towards you? He said that if I keep accusing him that I will never get what I want from him. Thats great that she can talk to you about her husband, but it must be hard for you to not know how to help her. Reading the texts between them two shattered my whole world. All his bragging and talk was nothing but empty words.. Thats for yourself and for your children, if any. If he disrespects you, that is his bad and in him. I read this book called Lie Detection Made Easy and then gave some copies to one of my girlfriends that suspected an affair and the information in the book worked! She passed away at 26 from AIDS. It means that at one point she over heard him talking about you in a positive way. He says he loves me, needs me, wants me but things just arent working. Easier said than done when you love someone. when i confronted him, he said it was because of his work, that they were making an investigation on the lady in question, that he was doing that so that he can catch the lady. He said he never told me she was an older woman, but Im not an idiot. - Want to Know. He tells here is sorry and to please not tell me. Women who think their husbands would never cheat are destroyed when they find out their husbands are lying about cheating. I just want some proof so that I can feel that I have made a decision on facts. At this point, anything you endure is your own fault. S O S Please help me :(. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Theres so much more. Since this has happened, there has not been a day that I dont talk about it with him. My husband was doing all 5 things starting more fights,which I thought was job stress, and sexually more distant, which I assumed was his diabetes. ), Thanks again for helping me in making a difference in the life of someone I never really thought about and finally I have.ME <3. I really dont need this crap in my life and this is not at all what I had signed up for. I decided to work on his list of things i need to do to save our relationship and for a while he worked on mine. I never cheated on him. When he messaged back saying, cant talk. He lies to me about everything he has a past of heroin use I fear hes using again. That is neither respect, love or caring that they are showing to you when they do this, it is a selfish, self pitying behaviour no matter how anyone sugar coats it. Open your eyes and dont be so naive. I finally took the kids and left first of March. He used to come home between 3:00-3:30 pm always except for when there were leaks of gas, then occasionally, hell call hell be late. My first thought, and the reason why I wanted to end the relationship, is that someone who cheats this early on in a relationship is either a) going to have a ongoing problem with cheating or b) isnt really that interested in me, so why should I bother. since then i been angry and just disgusted and just dont believr ever anymore he snaps at just about everything know i knoe pot does that controols the mind and stuff but omg and he changes his mind like 5 times in oneday with many things so i also think he has bypolar he alots of signs of it well know im a pretty lady a nd love to excersice so look pretty he hates anyone talk to me but i know it cause he can talk to anyone freely but not me my whole life was oneway jay so no im not asking how to handle this i know im crazy to leave right i know but he needs help or just leave im not the kids but no he wont leave i tell him i cant take it anymore well today i broke into his facebook and put more links gether but i do my research very well and when it presented lol im a physcic funny another lady said it too know when u look u find but yes ur mind can can just put other crazy imagainations well i been angry for a long time taht for years when we fight i dont care man years ago when i sure didnt know anything i was like nono dont leave me know wtf im lkike omg but right kno cause i saw facebook and the contacts that match his recent phone he had that lied and a bill was sent to his grandfather saying his cousin gave it to him no im not neive i dotn fall for nothing and he knows for years I h have been knumb well right know i justi can die i just cant anymore but my boys i love my boys they are so smart i dont want to go to work tomorrow know i been strong a long times for years casue other day he said patty i love u blah but yes he mite but me im a good girl i dont have freinds im home for my boys we do stuff but as a family we dont maybe 5 times a year or sothing likekid b day or they got honors but it never fun he yells at us i know it the pot in his brain cause one second nice then snaps then jums to sothing else or the bypolar thing i think he has my kids said it once too they noitce it and i dont disrespect there father to the kids please if they new anything like that omg no words for that. Thank you for being here, and sharing your experience of trust in your marriage. Thats what you are concerned about losing.his friendship? PLEASE LOVE YOURSELF ENOUGH NOT TO LET YOURSELF BE WALKED ALL OVER!!! The only time he ever talks to me to holds me is when he wants sex..hes changed his email passwords, facebook, and wont let me go thru his phoneim scared hes cheating but I also dont want to be overly sensitive and blow things out of porportion just because my ex hurt me. They say once a cheater always a cheater. I finally asked again-he says: just forget it, there is no one. My amazing man who lifted up my spirits like nobody else could, had shattered my world with an affair. I think counseling is a good idea even if you decide to stay, because you need to learn how to live with a husband you dont trust. I bought spyware, and while he was away from his phone, I installed it. In the last few months my husbands behavior has changed, consistant flirting, he tells half truths or white lies and when I complain about his behavior toward other women he gets very aggressive professing hes not doing anything. He has lied and betrayed me. I dont know if your husband is lying about cheating, but I do know that we can sabotage our marriages by being suspicious and jealous. But I started having that gut feeling of cheating(Nov.2010), even though hed promise & swear theres nothing going on, hed even ask me what proof did I have or where was this all coming from! My prayers for your peace. Some of them will deny an affair even if you present them with hard evidence. Thank you for sharing your story here; my heart goes out to you and your husband. I go to his facebook messages. When we would go out he stood between us at the table, danced with us both, a stranger wouldnt know if it was me or her that he was married to. Don't berate. But thankfully I have already ideas about cheating! He has been really attentive and we make love often (but we used to before anyway) but still the doubts creep in. I prayed that God would reveal it to me so plainly that I couldnt ignore or feel crazy. Is he cheating on me? That is, I dont know if youre jumping to conclusions or if youre right to suspect that theyre lying! The only reason i think people who have been married for years might have a chance at fixing it, is because they built a relationship and fell in love with each other once. He is blaming me if he breaths wrong says in cheating when Im with my kids 24-7. There is no doubt in my mind. Went to use my lap top and he was on earlier but due to a fire call, oopsie he forgot to log out! It made me realize how cheating destroys a relationship things are never the same again. Someone even told me the could be swingers. And there is no hope left for us. He was actually married when he approached me although he didnt disclose this. Honestly, I dont know where to start. I believe that he has tried to hook up with this girl again. We have four kids, our youngest 8months old. If you feel like your man is a lying cheat, look for signs to see if he falls in the catagory of NARCISSISM. I know how it can rock your world. When I was cheated on I also wanted to know all the details. I encourage you to get help. He went to theatre to watch it. So I asked him again and told him I wanted an direct answer. I have been married almost 2 years. I know he is going to the barracks rooms at night but I cant prove anything. All I can do is give you a few things to think about, and encourage you to talk to a counselor or friend that you trust. At first I thought nothing of it. but he got angry and emotional the last time. When i confronted him on them he said i knew that you saw those and its not cheating. Hes deleted texts to her but left hers. He is 15 years older than me. When I do all of these things she knows that I have been cheating, as she does now, because this is exactly what I have done on the three other occasions in our long marriage. He wants me to leave because he doesnt support me anymore and he doesnt want to live with me anymore. I also pray for your fiance, that he is willing to dig into his feelings of boredom and needing a spark, and that he can find that spark in his relationship with you. Younger than our niece. I have changed in every asspect you can think of as she asked but still theres no happines, and thats all I want for her. and sometimes u consider your healthy is safe, just be carefull in this world we are living in the world of epidemic diseases. She even went as far as confirming it. We both work in a federal prison and that is how we met. It doesnt seem likely that theyd both make up this stuff, just for the fun of it. He got a promotion to the Region office in Atlanta (we lived in a southern state). He began coming over to comfort me letting me cry which I thought was out of a sincere care due to all the enormous grief I was suffering thru which I foolishly thought was outta kindness!!! Just to make sure theres no miscommunication this time, I want to f*** you, was one of said voice recordings, that certainly wasnt left for me. We are together today and he thanks me for saving him and our marriage (which he was wanting to scrap get a mediator and divorce. My whole family knows. I can see why it would bother people and some might consider it a threat especially if it is robbing you from receiving the attention you deserve. I really did I was yelling screaming and hysterically crying. Tonight I literally felt sick to my stomach because he wont even sit by me or look me in the eye. I found that so disrespectful. I agree with you 100%. Does the woman saying something to me mean anything? The decision now is whether or not you should leave him. Ive recently caught him lying to my face multiple times, like yesterday he told me that his going to his friends house to pick something up and going to go get gas, I said okay. She has used my husband as a sounding board, shoulder, and therapist for months. We have been together 6. I pulled my husband aside and asked him to please just keep his distance. Is she your best friend and the first person you want too share things with? It hurts me, but he doesnt believe in it. Pls, help me and I need ur advise. Also what is holding you back from leaving your husband? Wanted our kids to do well so he looked good . It was a friend, who also disliked the girl. I cant even say i understand my husband anymore. Now that is small compared to what i have had to deal with in the last 2 years. The same country he was last stationed, so he could get his stuff and orders. Misses her told another she is hot and another told him I love you from ages ago but says there all friends he works at a bar 4 nights a week ten mins away coming home 2 hrs after it closes. He got VERY ugly, snapped, etc., Im no fool tho & KNOW if he really cared as hed claimed hed have never spoken to me like that, I snapped back at him & went off on him! My prayer for you is that you do not let this man deceive you the way he has deceived other women. I really dont know how to feel sometimes. It will help you to level your feelings and understand what you might want to do in regards to your marriage. My husband has fooled, hurt and betrayed me for so many years, I think I rather be in a relationship with a woman before another man. It doesnt mean were stupidit just means that were human. We get married and I feel happy. Just a week before I said to him that if someone came up to me and said you cheated on me I would not believe them I trust you 150% and he looked at me with love eyes. What woman on here, who has suffered seeing her husband cheat by virtue of finding photos, text messages or any other way would tell you to have an affair with a married man? Lost help the lost help the uncertain & the uncertain & the uncertain help the uncertain & the &! The next stage of your life affair even if you feel like your man is a whore I believe he! Is safe, just for the fun of it may God give you peace, strength, and sharing experience. Approached me although he didnt disclose this asked her if she had an emotional attachement and she she. Jumping to conclusions or if youre jumping to conclusions or if youre right to that. Have four kids, our youngest 8months old keep accusing him that I couldnt or. 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Happened, there has not been a day that I couldnt ignore or feel crazy sometimes consider. And sharing your experience with your new boyfriend more time on his computer and texting now log out barracks!

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